STORY: Jordan

My coworker and I jet out of the office at 4:00 to head to the beach for some volleyball. We were there for quite some time before two guys named Jeff and Jordan approached us to play a game. We jumped at the offer and made our friendly introductions.

Jeff was rather quiet at first and a bit older than Jordan. He seemed like a cool, low-key guy. Jordan, on the other hand, was a bit more comical and outspoken. After most likely having a decent bod, Jordan obviously let himself go, but still had the typical jock's confidence. He was a heavy smoker and a bit glib as most guys like that are, but I had no problem with him. Until...

While my coworker stepped away for some reason (probably to check his bag), I thought I'd start a friendly conversation with the two of them. It quickly shifted when Jordan asked me if one of the girls lying on the beach was hot. I honestly didn't know, so I told him I didn't notice.

"How could you NOT notice?," he asked in confusion. I shrugged and told him I just simply didn't notice. At that point, I assumed Jordan was single and suffering from a major case of "blue balls," but I was in no mood to deal with any straight bullshit (if you know what I mean) and wanted to change the subject.

Hoping he'd drop it, I leaned over to pull a Vitamin Water out of my bag, but before I could stand up, he says "How do you not notice females? What are you NOT hetero or something? Or is it a big question mark?"

I could tell he wasn't really joking by the tone of his voice and I didn't like it. I held back my tongue just in case he was an asshole. It took me a while to respond, because all I could do was look at him.

'Why would he ask me that and what does that have to do with anything?,' I thought. I was a bit panicked because I knew he was a chauvinist pig and probably a homophobe too and I didn't quite know how to reply. "You know what, Jordan? Let's just say it's a BIIIIG question mark," I snarkily replied.

I was so fuckin' mad, I can't remember what happened for the next 10 minutes, but I do know that his comment fucked up my attitude and ruined my fun. I regained control of myself after the first couple of games, but didn't forget what he said.

A lot of people might say "why the fuck do you care about his comment?" I care because there was no reason for it and he does not know me like that. Because I didn't notice this ONE chick out to the hundreds that were on the beach, he assumed something was wrong with me and decided to point it out in such a way that was condescending and disrespectful.

Mind you, I don't even notice most guys in a public setting, unless he's ridiculously hot. Was I supposed to be his pussy scout or something? I charge for services like that, but I came to the beach for one reason and that was to play volleyball. And that's what I was ready to do.

I can't stand it when straight men feel like they have to beat their chests and assert their manhood, especially when they need to put others down. Personally, I don't givva shit how many women they fuck (or want to fuck) 'cause it doesn't make 'em more of a man to me. It really, really doesn't.

On a side note, "gay" does not mean I won't or can't whoop a straight man's ass. I'm still a guy and I'm still loaded with testosterone, so they need to know how to come correct or it'll will be brought to their door step and straight from NY at that.

In this situation, I kept it cool. Yeah, I probably could have checked him or proudly have said, "yes, I'm gay damn it," but the fact of the matter is, it was none of his business. While I hate to lie about it, I'm not going to put myself in potential danger. Been there, done that.

He knew I was ticked off because I was visibly annoyed and had a hard time hiding it. I kept cool though, and pulled through because in the end, I played an awesome game and looked GOOD doing it.

As my coworker and I packed up to leave, Jordan privately called me over to apologize. I was afraid he was going to pry into my business at first, but he was sincerely sorry for being a douche bag and I accepted his apology.

I give him credit for admitting he was out of line and stepping up to rectify the situation. THAT is what makes a man a man and as of 11:33pm, I'm mostly over it because I learned something today and so did he.